I am sorry to hear about your difficulties. That must have been very hard to have miscarriages and lose a baby. I don't know what I would do, it makes me feel so sad. But you have so many beautiful children now and that is a real blessing.

I know how frustrating it is to gain weight, but if you only have a period every once in a while and now is that time then maybe it is mostly water weight. I get really bloated around that time of month and I never take my weight cause I know it will be higher than it should be.

I have to say though, losing 11 pounds in one month is fantastic. You seem so down about it, but most people (myself included) would be absolutely ecstatic about that. So give yourself a pat on the back and say "Good Job". Afterall, we can't expect to lose weight at the same rate month after month. Some months will be better or worse than others.

I think that you are doing an amazing job. I can see your achievements, even if you can't right now. You have already come so far.

I hope you have a great day!